Counting down the days which we are not promise of….

Assalammualaikum Wr. wb

If you noticed, I have stopped counting down the days of my husband’s return. The main reason is because he himself could not give a definite answer as to when he will make his return. In sha allah, when everything is confirm, will keep an update…

But the good news is…. Alhamdulillah we have survived… It is almost three months and the days has past much faster this year. We celebrated his birthday, mine and our anniversary apart… Which I am surprised I did not make a big fuss out of it… 

I felt ashamed of myself. For complaining when he had to work at night, when he have to be on reservists’ duties. Like wake up already… It was just a ONE night. But now, I went through many nights without him. On facebook, there are some ladies that posted on how their husband have to leave them for night duty/shift or whatever. 

I just wanna say you are lucky to still have your spouse physically there. Even when he is out for work, leave you with a cranky baby – thinking on how you going to “survive” . He will be home to help you around after he is done with his work or after his rest. Besides he is just a spouse, the one that we should rely on is Allah SWT. Pray for your husband well being while he is out for work instead of complaining cause he is out there trying his best to put food on your beautiful dining table and pray that He will make things easy for you whilst your husband is working. 

As of today, I am unwell together with my two boys. Imagine being heavily pregnant at 32 weeks and having to care for two boys that is cranky instead of taking care of your preggy-self. But I am not wishing for my husband to be around. I am not crying on my bed wishing he is here to comfort me.

I am praying for Him to make it easy for us three. I am desperately crying out to Him to make me feel better – on the inside, so I can be a better mom. Patience can be tested, may He only give ease to us. Aamiin. 

With this, I end my writing tonight with just a little word of my own. 

Believe in everything happens for a reason – you will see a beautiful reason for everything that has happened… 

Till my next better piece…

Assalammualaikum…. 

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Babbling Words

Faith. Lifestyle. Seafarer's wife. Mother. Children

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