New Transition for the Boys

Assalammualaikum Wr Wb

Time Check : 0116hrs *yawns*

So le Hubby decided to put the two boys in their own room after so long. They have been sleeping in our room – on their own bed , well except for my secondborn who will come crawling to our bed at 3am in the morning, ask for milk and settle himself in between us. We have literally no space for ourselves which explains the bodyaches and frequent waking up to change position. Me with my big tummy … How well rested can I get? 

But I do love having them in the same room, as a sense of security. Since I became a mother, I turned to be a light sleeper whereby the slightest move or sound would wake me up in a jerk. If they want milk, they would just ask for it . 

Since their sister’s crib is coming to our room and we have very little space with no room to sleep at all and no space to walk, that’s when le hub decided to put the brother’s bed in their own room.

it is tough as I am typing – secondborn suddenly wake up crying and he seems to refuse his bed … Culture shock maybe? Yea … Maybe =(

For firstborn – it does take a little push as well… But he is coming 4 yrs old this year and I believe it is about time we train him to sleep in his own room

It’s gonna be hard but we have to do what we have to do. When princess is born I can’t have my secondborn in bed with me as well as with the baby… Secondborn already sleeping so rough… 

I really do envy western style. They would put their newborn babies in their own nursey room since day 1z Of course they would monitor the baby with a baby monitor or something – with the advance technology it will come in handy… (Maybe I should consider….) 

But kids will be kids. They still want comfort and security. Even we adults do at times with our own parents…. 

Gotta pray hard that they will eventually accept they have their own room to sleep now…

May Allah SWT makes it easy for us

 

When you understand

Assalammualaikum Wr Wb

The week passes so quickly when you are at home. Situation does not permit me to go to work. Eldest being diagnosed with Hand Food Mouth Disease which leads him to be quarantined for this week. And also secondborn can’t attend school eventhough he was not diagnosed with it.

But alhamdulillah, of all the severe cases that i’ve heard, eldest just have a mild one with one ulcer. Of course the tedious part is making sure he washes his hands each time he sneeze, not sharing with his brother or better yet be close … Alhamdulillah, He has made it easy for me..

I was feeling a little bummed up these past few days and Honestly I do not know why. I get annoyed and angsty to every little thing. Sadly my children became my victim, same goes with my younger brother.

But talking to Him makes me feel better cause He is the only one who understands me. Understands my heart. Understands why I am feeling this way. If i were to sit with my bestfriend and tell her how I feel, I found that it won’t be the same. I won’t be able to cry my heart out cause Being me – always appear to be strong in every ones’ eyes.

But with Him, crying and letting my tears drop is just so easy. Cause I know He knows what I felt from the beginning. I could feel He is there infront of me watching and listening. Just letting me pour it out. It’s true. He is indeed the best listener.

Alhamdulillah. I felt that I have let out things from my chest. In sha allah, tomorrow will be a better day.

Moving on – at 37 weeks and 5 days, princess still does not feel to see the world just yet . I am really hoping she would come out anytime soon before her father sails again.

Till my next better piece….

Istighfar

imageAssalammualaikum WR Wb…

At times like this when I have lose patience as I did not have an easy morning…

Ya Allah , you know what’s best for me. I know that whatever you are delaying me for, is for the best for me… I know I did not take it easy and well, I have lose my patience, I muttered some words that I wish it wasn’t a prayer… hence forgive me …..

Alot of challenges in my life that I can be patience of but I know handling a fussy child is not my forte from the start. I have no idea at times how I can handle the situation.

Mainly I realize it is not from me, it is from Him.

Why do at one minute I was furious mad and another minute A reminder to myself that having children is a gift and an amanah that was entrusted to me cause He knows I can handle it? 

He gave me his reminder right on the spot when I just lose patience. Subhanallah.

Astaghfirullaha’lazim.

May Allah SWT ease my affairs for the rest of the day… Aamiin

Till my next better piece…

The Last Stage

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Assalammualaikum Wr Wb….

During this last stage of pregnancy, every mummy would understand me on how we so much so wants the baby out already!!

Yes, It is tiring – not mentioning the difficulty to move side to side on bed while sleeping, To get the comfortable position for both mummy and baby – ensuring we don’t “crush” them inside … Space constraint between me and my boys …. 

Experienced two childbirth does not exempted me from being anxious and nervous. 

My firstborn was on the tough side. They say that first child would not come out so soon – it is true, for me atleast. He came out on the 40th week 3 days later… This was a tough one. I have nobody telling me what I should do. Basically i was at home enduring the contraction for 3 days till I decide that i really could not take it. Went to the delivery suite and was told I am only 4cm dilated. Like are you serious? My mind is haywired and I thought it was time. Since I could not endure the contraction pain any longer as I was tired, I opted for epidural. Delivery was smooth cause I could not feel anything and baby was healthy. My first love…. 

My secondborn was super fast. I remember it was a Sunday. Was taking a morning nap and woke up to go to the toilet. Did my big business, went into the room and I feel a similar cramp. So i told my husband think i am beginning to have contraction. So the whole afternoon I was enduring it, late afternoon was finding a food that I have crave on. Then went on hunting for coconut water after fetching my eldest from his bio dad. Reached home was almost midnight. Endure – endure – endure… everything was happening so fast and I decided to go to the delivery suite around 1 am. My husband has been bugging me whether I wanna go to the hospital since noon but I told him I would not wanna go and then told I am not fully dilated yet. But I thought wrong… I was already 7cm dilated and the pain was similar like my first except that this time around I could feel like the baby wanna come out. Took another 2 hours in labor and he came out fast and furious. My secondborn, the forever cheeky and clingy boy. 

Now… Would it be the same for this princess here? Well I hope she comes out fast … I hope there won’t be any drama of waterbag breaks or bleeding cause I am only intend to start my naternity leave end of this month – didn’t want this drama to happen in the office at least… 

I am left with 24 days…. Ya Allah, please make it easy for me and please let my princess see her father before he sails off again. I want her to hear the voice of the man which will protect her as long as he lives …. Aamiin….

Till my next better piece…..

A home is where the husband is

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Assalammualaikum Wr Wb

Alhamdulillah, for all the things that I am blessed right now. 

The above title says it all – A home is where the husband is. 

I found myself being relaxed when he is around, having someone just beside you at times of silence is just the best thing. 

Allah SWT allows me to appreciate his presence a little bit more than usual. Usually I would find it annoying that he would leave things everywhere. 

But now just seeing his clothes around makes me smile. It has been too long that I have seen an empty and dry toilet – well cause he uses it more than me 😉

It has been too long that I have seen the back of our door empty – and now it is full of his clothes. 

It has been too long not having someone laying beside you and snoring away – I love waking up to this eventhough it is a dread to leave bed… 

Seeing him with the boys, playing with them, teasing them and talking to them. Makes me feels like my family is whole again.

If not,it will be the same routine everyday, I’ll be having a hard time getting the boys ready or even listening to me. Now it is just easy peasy cause the boss is back and the boys listened to him more than me. Good luck ya boys 😛

Time is very limited and I am trying to save my leaves as much as possible which means I can’t be with him in a day to have a date with him that much. He have told me that most to most it will be 2 weeks before he sail off again. 

Soon, it will all be empty again for another 90 days….. 

We will see what Allah SWT has planned for us cause He is indeed the best planner…

Till my next better piece…. 

Assalammualaikum….

His Return

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Assalammualaikum Wr Wb

Apologise for the late update.

Alhamdulillah, my love has return since Friday evening – and he left me clueless.

After my maghrib solat and I quickly have this feeling to went out the room, In thinking that my sons was being fussy with his uncle. Suddenly saw my father in-law and asked him why he did not tell me he was coming. Okay~~ this old man also another one – keep mum and just smiled. Saw Adam alone and was asking where’s adik. My FIL pointing towards the door area .. And suddenly saw my husband …

Only Allah SWT knows the feeling…

Happy? Confused? Touched? Surprised? After 85 days, it was all mixed…

Every night I would imagine how he would make his “grand entrance”.. Will it be a surprise or letting me know so that we can fetch him from the airport. After every prayer, I wish he could just appear infront of me and that I need a hug after “somewhat” hectic 85 days alone with the boys. Eventho my lil brother was around, the feeling is not the same. And imagining him just infront of me simply will bring tears in my eyes and I will shrugged off the feeling and say to myself “nah~ that will never happen, we still have XXX days to go…”

Of course, in every “fairy tale” a grand surprise entrance would be beautiful. And I got mine – with none other than my own husband.

These few days is just us spending time as well as running errand. He so much so want to go back to the sea, I don’t blame him cause that is his job. I am just happy and making use of the time whilst he is here.

Today, thought of taking leave to spend time just the two of us, but he told me to just go to work – which I guess we have next week for a long holiday to spend our time together… 

So now, just waiting for this little princess to make an appearance … I am currently at 35 weeks, I am left with one more week and it will be consider full term labor.

Hoping it will be before her father goes away for another 3 months… 

May everything goes smoothly for my family 💗

Till my next better piece…..

Assalammualaikum …

PS: told him I wanna take photo and he walked away…. He is not much of a “taking photo” person… 🙊