Assalammualaikum Wr Wb,
I have been meaning to write something but always end up doing other things which left me with no time to write once the boys is back. I felt like I have been unproductive since I started my maternity leave.
Wake up when the boys wakes up, pack the boys’s school bags, ate breakfast, nurse princess – if she does not fall asleep I would shower her, nurse her again if she wants. When she sleeps (always praying she would sleep a little longer) – I would cook, have my lunch, nurse her, put her to sleep and I would end up sleeping as well or watching some videos to keep me entertained (in the end I would regret this, should have taken a nap as well). And the rest of the day is just resting and nursing.
Nursing – or people know it as breastfeeding, takes a lot of you. Not to mention that automatically 500-700 calories is burn, you get tired and dehydrated. Every 2-3 hours throughout the day. So I guess, I am NOT ALL unproductive since I am providing the best for the princess. Alhamdulillah, she has been latching well. But I hate it during growth spurt (like the past few days). She would feed and vomit. And this continues for a few days. She will sleep lesser, always wanna be on top of me or cuddle. So…. growth spurt will last for a year I guess…. can’t run away from it…oh wells…..
Okay.. enough with the babbling..
The other day, my Eldest Adam was watching youtube on the ipad and he said he wants to watch “Mcqueen” – a character from the movie Cars. So I was busy nursing the princess and I told him, okay you press for me “C”and he literally showed me all the wrong letters.
He is upcoming 4 years old, honestly as a mom, I am more laidback and I don’t push my children in doing anything. I don’t join the “oh my child can potty train at age of 1 years old” or “oh my child can already speak simple words when he/she at age 1 yr and a half”. club of mummies.
I believe that every child has their own abilities and capabilities. They have their own pace too. Adam’s words were not that clear when he was 2. But of course as a Mom, I do understand him and I repeat using the correct words so he will know. My secondborn, Hayden, can already speak clear words (ATLEAST) at the age of upcoming 2 now.So every child is different. The difference is that Hayden was in school earlier than Adam. Initially Adam was in school but I have to pull him out as I was shifting to my in-laws. And he was looked after by our neighbour for a year. And when we finally got a place of our own, both of them join the new school.
Okay, so back to where I was….
I got SHOCKED that he does not recognize the alphabets. Shocked, sad, angry & confused. Like ~ doesn’t he learnt anything from school? He is in Nursery, shouldn’t they be more focused on teaching the children alphabets, phonics or whatever it is they called it nowadays. So I feedback to the husband about this. I am really really worried that I started to think is it me not giving him attention or is it himself? So I did raised my concern to the mummies forum/page. They said it’s normal and I should give him time…
So now I am trying to embrace myself in this new thing. THIS will be the next phase of me being a mom. Where knowledge and disciplinary comes from home, instead of letting go everything to the school. Obviously I could not remember at which age I recognized alphabets and numbers, but I do know my parents would stick the Alphabets & Numerical board on my room wall, which I would see it EVERYDAY, which also will lead me to memorizing. (Believe me, I am still bad at maths). So as a parent now, I shall not push them (which my parents does not do it to us siblings and we turned out well) but I would do my part as a parents.
No IPAD for Adam except for weekends. Hayden ~ a leeway for him as of now, but once he reached the same age as his brother, we will start educating him. Already bought magnetic alphabets and a exercise book for Adam.
I guess now to start of our new schedule, I should discipline MYSELF first in getting him to settle down and concentrate maybe say ~ twice a week, and also not to lose my short temper if he does not get it – in this way he won’t get anything in his head and I will be wasting my time and energy.
My expectation for my children is not that high. For this stage, recognizing the letters is important so he won’t be left behind if he starts K1 next year. As a parents, I would want things to be easy for my children. Let them struggle now, but we really do need to TRAIN their BRAIN.
May Allah SWT make it easy for us parents.
Till my next better piece…..