Rare nights like this whereby I would stay up to write something because I am inspired…
At the very least, I hope….
Tomorrow.. or in fact later in the afternoon, Mr will be signing on again at Thailand for another 3 months.
So last year we did not celebrate his birthday – no big deal, my birthday – no big deal and our 2nd year anniversary – no big deal…
Because I am no longer the girl who used to make it as an obligatory to celebrate these events.
This time around we are going to miss three big events as well. Which is Hayden’s 2nd Birthday next month, the whole month of fasting and the whole month of Raya Celebration.
Fasting would be difficult. For both of us. He will be working – he has his own “test” waiting for him while I believe I will have mine too.
Nobody likes to be alone in fasting month. Especially eating for Sahur and breaking the fast. I remember the last time I was alone when I started to fast back in 2013. Waking up alone and eat in silence. Breaking the fast alone and at the same time feeding a hungry baby.
It will be tough this time around, no doubt about it. But no hardship comes without ease as we, muslims believe. In Sha Allah.
He is the Al’Bashiir (Yang Maha Melihat)- He knows everything, every single steps we take present and in the future. He knows when our hearts feel empty. He knows what we want..
He is the Al’Muhaimin (Yang Maha Memelihara) – will take care of us. Wherever we are. Whether we need Him or not.
so when we pray for something.. I know He will grant it cause He is the Al’Mujiib (Yang Maha Mengabulkan) our prayers.
I have HOPE in Mr’s vision. It takes a lot of me to have hope and faith in something that I can’t see in the future. Especially with the higher rate of living in Singapore and having three kids. Will this sacrifice be worth it in the end? – honestly I won’t know. If it does not turn out like how we hope it would be, at least ~ I can tell myself..
“Ya know what – you took that leap of faith, and that’s all that matters”
Till my next better piece….