I am feeling a little bit “rajin” tonight so gonna blog a little bit on what I have been thru as a seafarer’s wife….
Basically the Mister came back last year around September , if I’m not wrong. And he was off again on November. And this time around, it will be 6 months voyage.
So… it has been about 2 and a half months now… and his vessel is currently sailing towards Singapore for now, from China. What I like about this vessel and alhamdulillah, even though we are miles apart for a month, whenever his vessel were to port at Singapore, he is allowed to be on shore leave.
Does not matter how many hours, I am just happy enough that he can see us, especially the kids.
Again, each timeI have people asking me about how do I cope with the kids without him? How do you even able to be without him? “Well I can’t be without my husband even for one night” she said!
Initially I can’t be without my husband even for one night. Yes I was like any other lady who is clingy with the husband. I remembered when he was on course at Batam for 2 days. One the morning he left, I already missed him so much, I cried badly and trying to struggle taking care of Minion 2. (Maybe because I was pregnant ah that time… hehe)
Thinking about it was just hilarious.
Anyhoos the first time he went away for 3 months and I was about 5 months pregnant that time, I felt alone. I felt down. I felt I just could not manage two elder minions on my own. I felt like I am going to suck big time being a mother to them.
I could not control my anger. I could not control any of my emotions. At times I feel good, at times I feel moody. And sadly, I vent my mood on my two elder minions (yes I do feel guilty which I cried everytime they went to sleep)
This was going on everyday for a week. I decided that I CANNOT BE LIKE THIS! That I am stronger than this. So I get my mood back, get distracted with work, get more socialize with my friends, getting my in laws to look after the minions while I have some time out.
At the same time, in this very situation, I turned to ALLAH and Quran as my companionship.Each time I missed the Mister and feeling down, only Him can make me feel better. And I realized that, maybe, just maybe, our life turned out like this to make us love HIM more, to make us miss each other, to make us love each other more. And to make us longing for each other and on a mercy of ALLAH swt to keep our partner safe and sound.
So now, I have the answer to the question on “How do you do it?”
My answer will be…
Cause I have ALLAH swt.
Till my next better piece…