What is the first question to be ask on the day of Judgement?

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Assalammualaikum Wr. Wb

As usual, I have been meaning to write but not quite inspired … 

But days ago, I felt blessed and it took me some time to realize it cause I never really look beyond…

Back then when I was working in a big company, I told myself, “okay, I am not going to miss a prayer cause it will be like a chore for me once I got back and I will rush into it. So no matter what, I WILL STILL PRAY ! Approved or not approved by the management. “

And there was a collegue of mine whom I called Uncle, prayed Zuhur during lunch – cause he lunch in which makes it easier for him. And before I start anything, I ask him, what will he do, how he take wudhu at the toilet (easier for men) and which stairways flight he will take. Cause some collegues of ours would take the stairs to go to the pantry therefore we do not want to startled them or made them “paiseh”  – it’s best to be unnoticeable.

Yes, he prayed in the staircase area. I just don’t understand – of all the office rooms that a company have, a space for a 5 minute or less prayer is just too much for them. Luckily, in Islam, you can pray anywhere provided the area is clean, even if it is not, we can just use a piece of cloth to cover it.

Alhamdulillah for Allah SWT has actually make it easy for us.

So after I did my research, I tried for a day. Then slowly it became everyday. But there are times, honestly, I just feel lazy, cause it is just way too much. Woman in Hijab, you have to take out your hijab, you have to put it on after and pinned all over again. This alone takes up 5 – 7 mins of your time. In total, you went MIA 10 mins max from your desk. And at the back of your head – you got worried your boss will look after you. You get worried your HR noticed you went for a longer lunch (when at time Zuhur is towards the end of lunch time)  – this –  which I went thru personally. Being questioned on my lunch hour. PFFT. Yea i know right ~

But …………………………….. there is always a blessing to everything. You took the hassle to rush yourself to Allah Swt. You are in between performing your purpose to ALLAH Swt and holding to the amanah (job) that is given to you. You are doing the best you can to fulfill what is bestowed upon you and what is given to you.

There are days whereby I have a strong iman, I’ll be like “yea man.. I am doing this …” and when I have weak iman, “yea… later I will qada’ at home, it’s okay, as long as I pray.” In the midst of everything, deep inside, I prayed that it would be good for me to work at a place whereby I need not rush thru my prayer and no longer find it such a hassle (astaghfirrullah).

Once I even thought of working in a madrasah or masjid as an admin just because I want fulfill my prayer.

Little did I know and how late has I come to realize, that Allah Swt has actually answered the prayer made by this heart of mine.

I am working with my mom right now. She did a partition at the back of the office , just the little space for us to pray. We did our wudhu with a spray bottle or bottle of water because the toilet is a public toilet. And best of all, I do not have to worry about my “boss” looking for me….. ;p

It was all so easy. I went home, have time to fetch my kids without rushing (alhamdulillah for my small ride) masyaAllah. I have time for myself before magrib. Ate dinner after magrib – wait for Isya’ and then I end my night with my kids. No worries, nothing.

SubhanAllah.

Of course, everyday is not that easy peasy. Some days my kids have melt down I have to attend to them first. Once they are okay, I will dismissed myself for a while to pray. Some times, we went out for dinner as a family outside, and of course rushing home to pray.

It all depends but certainly, He has make it easy for us all.

And with that, I believe when your intention is good and  pure, He will make it happen.

I am not pious, nor even close to be pious. I am a sinner but I want to be better…

With this, till my next better piece…

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